AB Says You Matter
So, I have started watching basketball. You can say and think what you want to say and think, but yes, it is because of Caitlin Clark. I am from Iowa, after all, and I watched the University of Iowa girls basketball team the entire 2023 season and then I watched the WNBA Draft ….and every single Fever game last year (and even was blessed to attend one!)
I have started following WNBA basketball and I know coaches names, who got traded, who is on which team now, who got a double double this week, who got cut because of cap space, etc…
I watched the Draft this year, and it’s just become part of me, at least for this time in my life. It’s kind of funny and kind of crazy, but along with being in awe of Caitlin Clark (and feeling the need to defend her from naysayers), I have also fallen in love with the other women on her team. I seriously love their personalities and their quirks.
I could talk about several of them, but one that just gets to my heart is Aliyah Boston. She is incredible. She is feisty, but she is tender. She has Caitlin’s back. She defends her, supports her, and encourages her. They call her AB and I’ve decided that everybody needs an AB in their life. AB reminds Caitlin how important she is and to just breathe and enjoy this phenomenal time in WNBA history.
There is another AB (Aibee) that reminded someone that she was important. She said this, “You is important.” Do you remember?
The movie, The Help, came out in 2011. In the movie, Viola Davis plays Aibileen Clark, a resilient and compassionate maid. who provides nurturing care for the children she looks after. For several years at least, she was with this one family and we get a peek into their lives. The little girl that she watched after called her Aibee. (AB)…. And that little girl loved Aibee. I don’t remember lots of things about the movie…but I remember Aibee looking at that precious little girl and telling her words that all of us need to hear. You is kind. You is smart. You is important. And I remember that little girl loving her so much and one time she even told her, “Aibee, you’re my real mama.”
Aibee would look that little girl in the face and tenderly tell her how important she was. And that little girl believed her. I believe that all of us need to be reminded that we are important. I don’t think I’m the only person who has ever lost sight of the fact that I matter.
We get busy. We get knocked down a bit. We get hurt. We get tired. We get cranky. We mess up. We live in a rough world. Stuff happens. And we have people around us who tell us what we do wrong or just how we could do things better. Or they just give us looks – and we fill in the blanks. Or we just give up. A little at a time, we stop doing that thing that will help us towards our dream. We stop believing that things can be different. We stop trying to find a better tomorrow. We stop asking ourselves questions and we stop growing. There are days that we barely recognize ourselves. And we say things like, “Oh what’s the point?”
We stop thriving and we just survive. It happens.
I have a good life. I am married, and I have five grown children. I have some in law children that I love like my own and some grandbabies that melt my heart. I have good friends and I’m so very blessed.
I have some dreams and I’ve started doing some things that I think really do matter, but sometimes things don’t go so easily. I had a dream to take the book of Proverbs in the Bible and turn each chapter into a Children’s Book and I have 3 books in the project so far. Proverbs 1 is called No Silly Birds. Proverbs 2 is called Beware the Belly Bugs, and Proverbs 3 is called The Gutsy Gorilla.
The books are written just as the book of Proverbs in verse form. For example, Proverbs 3:5 tells us to: Trust in the Lord with all of our hearts and lean not on our own understanding.
For children, Proverbs 3:5 in the Gutsy Gorilla says this:
It might seem like it’s brave to do things by yourself, but being truly gutsy means that you trust God for help. Trust in the Lord with all your heart, lean not on you, ‘cuz that ain’t smart.
It’s fun, it’s quirky, and it’s the ShanZ version. (That’s me – first syllable = Shan, second syllable = Z)
So, I’ve got the first three chapters done and I love them, but I have discovered that writing the books and even paying to have them illustrated in exactly the way my mind sees them and paying to have them published – is only the first parts of the battle. My goodness – getting them out there is a whole HUGE process. And I feel inadequate at times. And I get tired. And I’m busy. (I currently am watching one of my precious grandsons, three to four days a week. I also do taxes and we have just come off of tax season where I did about 50 different sets of taxes.)
I go through things. And I want to quit. I feel very unimportant so very often.
And sometimes, I just think, “Oh what’s the point?”
Maybe you have never been there….or maybe you are there in your life right now. And, I just thought….EVERYBODY NEEDS AN AB!! DON’T QUIT.
Maybe you have some really hard situations in your life right now. Maybe you have had a breakup with your spouse of over 20 years. One of my good friends is in that situation. IT’S HARD. Divorce, single mothering, a special needs son, five other children in various stages of life and need, and she feels so alone. She is a warrior. But man. It’s hard.
Maybe you are like another friend of mine whose own mom has decided she is a thief and that she is the worst scum of the earth. And this girl has not done anything to make her mom feel that way! Maybe you are like another friend of mine who has a daughter who will not speak to her and has accused her mom of terrible things. Maybe you are hurting. Maybe you are sick. Maybe you are desperate to live life in a different way and you do not know where to begin. I want to be your AB right now. I want to encourage you. Find a promise in God’s Word! They are there, I assure you!
Hebrews 4:15 tells us that we have a high priest who is able to sympathize with our weaknesses, because He in every respect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin. Jesus relates to our struggles! We are not alone.
As a young child, we often sang the song, Jesus loves me, this I know. Some of you need to sing it again. Over and over. Find a situation in the Bible that relates to you. Maybe you are like the woman at the well. Jesus encounters this Samaritan woman. (Remember, the Samaritans are a group traditionally despised by Jews.) Jesus reveals his understanding of this woman’s past and her spiritual needs. He loves her and offers her living water and through their conversation she comes to recognize Him as the Messiah. He doesn’t come to her and tell her what a scumbag she is. He asks her about her husband and she says that she doesn’t have one and Jesus tells her that she has answered correctly. He tells her that he knows that she has been married five times and that she is currently living with a man that is not her husband. He KNOWS her, and he LOVES her.
He talks to a Samaritan and He is a Jew, so He broke racial and religious barriers. He talks to a WOMAN and this broke some gender rules. He talks to a woman who is known to be marginalized and demonstrated his love and compassion by reaching out to this woman on the fringes of society. He doesn’t just talk to her, but he genuinely connected with her on a personal level, showing her that she was seen and valued. He said, “You is important”.
And I’m telling you that today, Jesus will do the same for you. He wants to hold you close and tell you that you are important. You are smart. You are kind. You are His. You are chosen. You are enough.
There are so many more stories in God’s Word where He just loves people. His Word shows us over and over again how very important we are. We have to learn to listen to what He says about us, and not what our family says, our neighbors say, our enemies say. If you have an AB, listen to what she says.
Because, I don’t know about you, but sometimes – I need to be reminded.